We here at Bus Leagues Baseball have a great affinity for amazing names. We oogle them, honor them, and basically think they should be held in higher regard than any statistic. After all, people will remember a good name much longer than they will remember how well a player did in high pressure situations on Tuesdays in July with Venus in line with Pluto.
Our affinity for hearty handles has even made its way into our writing. Over at Eric’s college basketball blog Storming The Floor, for example, he presents an annual God Shammgod Award for the college hoopster with the best name and best stats – silly surnamed scrubs need not apply.
Well, lo and behold, MiLB.com shares our fondness for great names. While surfing the site, I discovered the 4th Annual Minors Moniker Madness, a 64-entry tournament to determine the best name in the Bus Leagues. The winner of the tournament receives the Wonderful Terrific Monds III Award.
Before I break down each bracket, here are a few names I thought should have gotten a shot:
- Tobi Stoner
- Bubba Bell
- Jeff Manship
- Freddie Freeman (needs a great nickname, maybe “Fast”?)
- Jose Costanza (bonus for being in the Yankees organization)
- Brian Friday (just the facts, ma’am)
- Bo Bowman (alliteration always helps)
- Roidany Aguila
- Tim Palinscar (what the ex-Governor drove around Anchorage)
- Benito Beato
- Burt Reynolds
- Jordi Amargos (it’s a name thing)
- Jonny Bravo (hey there, pretty lady …)
Ok, now for who actually made the tournament:
In the Icicle Reader Bracket I like:
1 ZeErika McQueen over 16 Mike Piazza
2 Mark Hamburger over 15 Zach Outman
3 Yangevris Solarte over 14 Clevelan Santeliz
4 Chorye Spoone over 13 Dock Doyle
11 Qualon Millender over 6 Riaan Spanjer-Furstenburg (UPSET)
5 Jetsy Extrano over 12 Brett Butts (barely)
7 Diego Seastrunk over 10 Will Rhymes
8 Gift Ngoepe over 9 Cyle Hankerd
In the Farmer Works Bracket, I like:
1 Sequoyah Stonecipher over 16 T.J. Large
2 Rowdy Hardy over 15 Dale Cornstubble
3 Stolmy Pimental over 14 Alden Carrithers
13 Josh Smoker over 4 Kila Ka’aihue (UPSET)
5 Sharlon Shoope over 12 Zachary Petersime
6 Norris Hopper over 11 C.J. Riefenhauser
10 Atahualpa Severino over 7 Porfirio Martinez (UPSET)
8 Jarrod Saltalamacchia over 9 Willian Avinazar
In the Natty Nattress Bracket, I like:
1 Forrest Snow over 16 Gookie Dawkins
2 Skyler Stromsmoe over 15 Seth Schwindenhammer
3 Stosh Wawrzasek over 14 Beamer Weems
13 Zelous Wheeler over 4 Blake Nation (UPSET)
12 Sugar Ray Marimon over 5 Elisaul Pimentel (UPSET)
6 Hawkins Gebbers over 11 Stephen King
10 Petey Paramore over 7 Leighton Pangilinan (UPSET)
8 Boomer Potts over 9 Kleininger Teran
In the Razor Shines Bracket, I like:
1 Al Alburquerque over 16 Barbaro Canizares
2 Shooter Hunt over 15 Stephen Batts
3 Didi Gregorius over 14 Tyson Van Winkle
4 Callix Crabbe over 13 Jordan Flasher
5 Tuffy Gosewisch over 12 Junior Lake
6 Austin Bibens-Dirkx over 11 Ben Tootle
10 Zechry Zinicola over 7 Maverick Lasker (UPSET)
8 Bubbie Buzachero over 9 Buddy Boshers
What do you think? Am I overlooking anyone? Selling anyone short?
Okay, here’s what I’ve got:
Icicle Reader Bracket
1 ZeErika McQueen over 16 Mike Piazza
2 Mark Hamburger over 15 Zach Outman
14 Clevelan Santeliz over 3 Yangevris Solarte
4 Chorye Spoone over 13 Dock Doyle
6 Riaan Spanjer-Furstenburg over 11 Qualon Millender
5 Jetsy Extrano over 12 Brett Butts
7 Diego Seastrunk over 10 Will Rhymes
8 Gift Ngoepe over 9 Cyle Hankerd
Farmer Works Bracket
1 Sequoyah Stonecipher over 16 T.J. Large
15 Dale Cornstubble over 2 Rowdy Hardy
3 Stolmy Pimental over 14 Alden Carrithers
4 Kila Ka’aihue over 13 Josh Smoker
5 Sharlon Shoope over 12 Zachary Petersime
6 Norris Hopper over 11 C.J. Riefenhauser
10 Atahualpa Severino over 7 Porfirio Martinez
8 Jarrod Saltalamacchia over 9 Willian Avinazar
Natty Nattress Bracket
1 Forrest Snow over 16 Gookie Dawkins
15 Seth Schwindenhammer over 2 Skyler Stromsmoe
14 Beamer Weems over 3 Stosh Wawrzasek
13 Zelous Wheeler over 4 Blake Nation
5 Elisaul Pimentel over 12 Sugar Ray Marimon
11 Stephen King over 6 Hawkins Gebbers
10 Petey Paramore over 7 Leighton Pangilinan
8 Boomer Potts over 9 Kleininger Teran
Razor Shines Bracket
16 Barbaro Canizares over 1 Al Alburquerque
2 Shooter Hunt over 15 Stephen Batts
3 Didi Gregorius over 14 Tyson Van Winkle
4 Callix Crabbe over 13 Jordan Flasher
5 Tuffy Gosewisch over 12 Junior Lake
6 Austin Bibens-Dirkx over 11 Ben Tootle
7 Maverick Lasker over 10 Zechry Zinicola
8 Bubbie Buzachero over 9 Buddy Boshers
Oh, yes — Xavier Avery; now THAT’S a name. None of these, by the way, hold a candle to indy-league standout Buck McNabb.
I think Zelous Wheeler is the most underrated name in the tourney. Seriously, a 13?
I think Roidany got jobbed. That has to be a political thing. Nobody wants the word “roid” anywhere near baseball.
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